As I prepared to minister to people who were in fact, ministering to me; all I could think of was the “Gift” of servanthood. It was in that very moment that I realized, my entire life had been poured out in preparation for what was to come. It was in that moment, that I beheld not the faces of children but the faces of angels on earth.
I mean, how could I describe such a scene of authentic purity! Having the bare minimum but yet have it all, would be the only way that I could describe the scene before me. All I could do was stare in amazement, wondering and hoping that this is what my worship looked like before God.
I was humbled beyond belief, as the congregation sat in anticipation to hear from me….while all I wanted to do was sit in their presence, soaking it in. Isn’t it humbling how people can look to you for what you feel they have more of?! Wow! Though many of my experiences in East Africa brought change, it would ultimately be the moments of humility that would change me the most.
You see, I’ve “spent” my life giving my “all” while keeping so much and it wasn’t until I found myself in the MotherLand for 3 months, that I learned what surrender really looked like. It wasn’t until I seen men, women, boys and girls selling fruit, vegetables, batteries, locks (etc) at 1am because their life depended upon it; that I realized giving your all, leaves nothing on reserve.
This has become the lesson that has taught me one of the greatest truths about my faith. That lesson being, my faith has not received a priceless tag until, I no longer look for anthing in return. Deep and Sobering, I know! However, I learned in my personal decision to obey, I also have a personal decision to daily surrender. I used to think they were one in the same until I understood that a person could obey God but yet surrender to Him, only on their terms.
I was willing to give my all, as long as I got to choose when and where. I was willing to surrender, as long as I remained comfortable. But then 3 months in the MotherLand happened and I tell you, Nothing has been the same since.
Living each moment, ready for any and everything that God has for me has been the compass of life since encountering Kenya and Uganda. This truth has been my reality and source of joy and stability. Knowing each day, that my obedience can unlock the door of favor has been more than enough motivation.
When I watched these children in worship, I heard God say, “Are you giving me your all or are you giving me what’s left”? (after you’ve placed a few things on reserve). In this very moment, I ask you the same question…..Are you giving God your all, or are you giving Him what’s left?